Road Test: 2009 Mercedes-Benz SLK 55 AMG
Story and photos by John LeBlanc
Monte Carlo–What does it take for amaudit Anglais to get arrested in this two-bit Mediterranean town?
Good question. Especially after squealing the rear Pirelli P-Zeros of my 2009 Mercedes-Benz SLK 55 AMG Roadster within an arm's length of one of the stoic gendarmes who patrol the narrow streets here in Monte Carlo.
Why the flagrant driving gesture?
It's quite simple.
Like Toronto's ill-fated Champ Car race, the Monaco Grand Prix runs on public streets. Anyone with a driver's licence and a means of getting here can drive the same potholed pavement that Kimi Raikkonen and Lewis Hamilton will be banging carbon fibre on when the Formula One circus rolls into this Mediterranean town in May.
Now, a certain Mr. Schumacher (not Ralf!) owns the Monaco GP's lap record of 1 minute, 14.3439 seconds. But that was on a closed course, in one of those fancy-pants F1 cars.
So how long would it take to lap the same route in a street car in regular traffic? And in doing so, how long would it take for me to end up in the local hoosegow?
I rationalized: "Hey! It's Monaco! How bad could the local lock-up be? Designer coveralls? Diamond encrusted cuffs? Dom Perignon and brie in the café?"
Palm trees near the south entrance to the harbour on Boulevard Albert 1er border the start/finish line of the famed 3.34 km Circuit de Monaco. Which, on this sunny Tuesday morning, is filled with scooters, pedestrians, tour buses and sooty, diesel-stained Renault Méganes. All deterrents to me chasing Michael Schumacher's record time.
Following the circuit's mapped directions from the $87,000 SLK's standard navigation system, I make a right at the course's first turn, known as Sainte Devote.
With a 355 hp eight-cylinder wedged in a vehicle about the weight and wheelbase of a compact car, I'm ready for the inevitable power oversteer when I tromp the throttle. And there it is ...
The SLK's rear end tries to wiggle under the strain of 376 lb.-ft. of torque. But traction control and sheer dumb luck abate the hand-made 5.4 L V8 (this one by Sasha in AMG's Affalterback, Germany shop) from propelling me over the stone retaining wall only a few metres to my right.
Uh oh. My first gendarme sighting. It disappointedly forces me to throttle back in my run up the hill through Beau Rivage. Surprisingly, monsieur recognizes why I'm here. Maybe he thinks I'm one of the many Germans who like sunny vacations here. Who cares. He waves me toward Massenet, through a part of the race course that is normally not open to the public.
The anticipated tight left-and-right through Casino – Turn 4 if you're keeping track at home – runs counter to the direction of the street for the public. To stay on course, I have to bust a move in front of a hotel security guard and motor around the traffic circle against the One Way sign.
The rent-a-cop seems more concerned that the showy Bentleys and Rolls-Royces of his hotel guests don't get nicked, so I don't warrant a furrowed brow or waved finger despite my obvious infraction. Maybe Mercedes is prototyping some kind of stealth technology in my very black car.
Carrying on, two-way traffic and parked scooters on the apex prevent me from taking the proper inside line at the famous Grand Hotel Hairpin. But the SLK's new "direct-steer" system makes the very quick left though the tight turn a snap.
Cosmetics aside, little else on the AMG model of the SLK has been changed for '09 that affects the driving experience. Engine, suspension, brakes and meaty 225/40 front and 245/35 rear 18-inch rubber all remain the same: competent, but nothing to trade in your Porsche Boxster S for.
I follow the tall stone wall that shadows the run down, along Avenue des Spéluges to Turn 8, named Portier. It's a sharp right before the long tunnel that heads back to the harbour.
Jealously, I eye a parked driver in a white Peugeot 308 receiving some kind of ticket from a pair of gendarmes on motorbikes. Why him? What about me?
So, like a child looking for his parent's attention, I try to show off what the muscular Merc roadster does best.
Despite traffic behind me, I come to a stop before the darkness of the tunnel. Feet pressed firmly against both accelerator and brake pedals, I release the brakes and the big V8's roar starts banging off the concrete cavern as I rifle through three of the SLK autobox's seven gears ... whoosh! bam! ... whoosh! bam ... whoosh! bam!...
I don't see the near 280 km/h that Raikkonen and his friends will pull here in the dark during the real race. But Mercedes's claim its little monster of a roadster will go from 0-to-100 km/h in less than five seconds is credible.
Oh, and the SLK's brakes work really well, too.
The rest of the Monaco course along the harbour through Nouvelle Chicane, Tabac and Piscine is flatter, its topography less dramatic. Plus I am now resolutely stuck behind a less ambitious "Fleur de Pot" delivery van driver.
After the final corner on the course, Anthony Noghès, I pull the Merc over and check the time. No surprise – and no fault of the car – Schumacher would have done six laps in the time it took me to do one.
Equally surprising is my lack of punishment. Apparently driving like a hooligan in Monte Carlo – in a car that is a bit of a hooligan itself, whether Mercedes likes it or not – gets about as much attention as yesterday's Rolex.
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One Response to “Road Test: 2009 Mercedes-Benz SLK 55 AMG”
September 12th, 2010 @ 10:11 pm
[…] super sports and its 563 hp, Mercedes also had on hand AMG-tweaked versions of the E-Class sedan, SLK roadster, CLS four-door coupe, SL grand tourer, S-Class luxury sedan and ML SUV. The only models not present […]