Top 10s: New Cars for Divorced Dads

By John LeBlanc You don’t have to check the online dating ads to know that the rate of divorce in Canada is much higher than it was in the late 1960s. According to the federal department Statistics Canada’s figures, in 2003 there were 224 divorces for every 100,000 people in this country, roughly four times the number in 1968. So if you're a male parent that’s separated, divorced, or dreaming of a breakup—and also in the process of looking for a new set of wheels—here are 10 of my favourite new cars for Divorced Dads:

For Divorced Dads Who Wear Nomex: 2012 Nissan GT-R

If hanging out with “fast” women got you in the marital trouble you’re in now, then why not get a really “fast” car to close the loop on your new image. One of the quickest is the thoroughly updated for 2012 Nissan GT-R. Since the first GT-R to be sold in Canada was launched in 2009, Nissan’s engineers have been working away at their facility near Germany’s Nürburgring race circuit to make the 2012 model even quicker, handle better and be more livable for those who thought the previous car sacrificed refinement for all-out performance. And to stay one step ahead of your Ex’s divorce lawyer, the GT-R’s hand-assembled 3.8-litre twin turbo V6 with 530 hp squirts the coupe from zero to 100 km/h in under three seconds.

For Prolific Divorced Dads: 2011 Ford Flex

Despite some minivan makers boasting of their “man vans”, some self-respecting Divorced Dads wouldn't be caught dead behind the wheel of any vehicle with sliding doors. But if you have more offspring than pairs of shoes, the funky-looking Flex is a slick way to go down the road AND schlep the kids around. Relative to more mundane looking minivan rivals, the Flex offers a bit of exterior style. And on the highway it’s the master of the road trip. One of the six- or seven-passenger Ford's biggest assets is its limo like cabin. A generous amount of passenger room (especially in the second row), with upscale materials throughout. While features like Ford's hands-free Sync, navigation, and audio/DVD entertainment systems will keep your crew entertained and you sane.

For Green Divorced Dads: 2012 Toyota Prius V

If you and your Ex couldn’t agree on your family’s environmental goals, one of the “greenest” cars you can buy (now that you’re on your own) is Toyota’s iconic Prius. But what if you’re a Divorced Dad looking for a bit more cargo and kid space? Let me present the new Prius V”—as in “versatility”—that goes on sale this fall. With 50 per cent more interior room than the Prius, the V seats five adults comfortably, with up to 971 litres of cargo space when its reclining rear seats are down. And using the existing Prius’ gas-electric hybrid powertrain, Toyota says the Prius V will deliver the best fuel efficiency of any SUV, crossover or wagon in the market today, and a 66 per cent reduction in smog-forming emissions compared to an “average” new vehicle.

For Outdoorsy Divorced Dads: 2011 Jeep Grand Cherokee

After the trials of any relational breakup, there’s that natural euphoria of newfound freedom. And what better way for the outdoor loving Divorced Dad to take the family on that much anticipated hunting/fishing trip that the Ex would never sign off on. The vehicle of choice for such an excursion has to be the new  Jeep Grand Cherokee. Longer and wider than its predecessor, rear seat occupants now enjoy more legroom in the new Grand Cherokee. And although its legendary all-wheel-drive capabilities will get you and your kin to any off-road retreat, the Jeep is also a refined drive on the paved parts. Potholes and rough pavement are seen, but rarely felt and seldom heard. Plus its steering is more accurate and direct than the last model, and the big SUV can prove relatively nimble in back-to-back corners.

For Well-to-Do Divorced Dads: 2011 Audi A8

Once the child support and/or alimony cheques have been taken care of, the Well-to-Do Divorce Dad should reward himself with a little bit of ostentation. And in the highly competitive luxobarge class, there’s no better example right now than the new Audi A8. As a technological tour de force, the A8 not only introduces a wave of new high-tech goodies, all are presented to the driver and passengers in a natural, intuitive way (like a nav system that accepts handwritten directions). If your children are older or need a bit more room for their growing limbs, go for the stretched L version, it makes the A8 a veritable limo. And from a driver’s perspective, know that the all-wheel-drive Audi flagship sedan is the best driving car in its class as well.

For Alternative Lifestyle Divorced Dads: 2011 Volkswagen Eos

You can define the idea of a “family” in many different ways these days. Even if the two divorced partners are Dads. For such a demographic, there’s the Eos. With its folding hardtop that makes it either a coupe or a convertible at the push of a button, it’s one of the most aesthetically pleasing and flexible small coupes you can buy. Detail oriented Divorce Dads will appreciate the Eos’ premium materials, accompanied by well-thought-out controls and supportive seats. Relative to much sportier VW offerings like the Golf GTI or Jetta GLI, the Eos’ road talents have been slightly dumbed down. Its rather soft handling offsets its well-weighted steering and a supple ride. But compared to rivals, the Eos is one of the rare convertible-coupes that gives its driver something to do other than watch the metal top go up and down.

For Minimalist Divorced Dads: 2011 Mini Cooper Countryman

Perhaps in the process of extricating yourself from your Ex, you’ve been left with less means than when the two of you shared expenses. For those Divorced Dads on a budget, the inexpensive-but-premium Mini Cooper Countryman is a great pick. The new Countryman is the largest Mini to date since the modern version was introduced in 2002. About the size of VW Golf, it’s the first Mini ever to offer four-doors, a hatch and available all-wheel-drive. The pair of Countryman rear passengers get their own bucket seats (they also recline and slide back and forth). And when folded flat, rear cargo space expands to 1,170 litres—considerably more than the 928L the extended Mini Clubman offers and about twice that of the base Cooper hatchback.

For Overprotective Divorced Dads: 2011 Volvo XC70

Let’s face it: now that you’re left with the caring of your children on your own, it’s understandable if you want to make sure you buy a safe car. For that, you’ll want to look at the Volvo XC70, one of the last station wagons the Swedish brand still makes. As you would expect, the XC70 comes standard with a  plethora of airbags, and a host of state-of-the-art electric nannies. But maybe the Volvo’s biggest safety attribute is its inherent non-sporty persona. Even without the kids onboard, you’ll rarely want to play Boy Racer in the commodious Volvo wagon. What Divorced Dads will also appreciate are the all-wheel-drive XC70’s wonderfully comfortable seats, solid build quality, excellent all-weather attributes, and a square back roofline that delivers plenty of cargo space.

For Devil-May-Care Divorced Dads: 2011 Porsche 911 Turbo S

For those Divorced Dads who don’t really car what anyone thinks, may I recommend one of the most glamourous, yet practical, sports cars you can buy: the new 911 Turbo S, Porsche’s all-weather road missile that also happens to have room for four. Except for the Porsche Club Racing-ready GT2 RS, the 530 hp Turbo S is the most-powerful 911 you can buy. Thanks to a rapid-firing seven-speed dual-clutch automatic, and a sophisticated launch control system, zero to 100 km/h takes a mere 3.3 seconds. But the Turbo S is also a great day-to-day car. With AWD—with the appropriate set of winter tires—makes this a Porsche you can really drive through a Canadian winter.

For Muscle Car Divorced Dads: 2012 Dodge Charger SRT8

Some Divorced Dads are not only struggling with the breakup of their marriage, but also simultaneously suffering through a mid-life crisis. For most fathers with freedom, two-door muscle cars like a Chevy Camaro or Ford Mustang simply aren’t a practical decision. That’s where the new Dodge Charger SRT8 sedan comes in: the muscle car for Divorced Dads. With fresh styling that riffs off the late 1960s original, the new Charger SRT8 also gets a big upgrade under its long hood. Yes, it’s a Hemi V8—a 6.4-litre version that first debuted in the Challenger SRT8 392, putting out 465 horsepower and 465 pound-feet of torque—with a rumble that will scare the neighbours. The SRT gang also added an adaptive damping suspension with Auto and Sport settings that process speed, steering angle, brake pressure, throttle application and lateral acceleration to the high-performance Charger. Your kids will say, “Sweet!”

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